I caught myself in the act of a “bougie ass girl from LA” thought today… well “a” thought was more like “a few”, but the one that got me examining my sanity a little deeper was this thought that had me contemplating buying an $8 bottle of “juice”. No no, not an apple juice, not even orange juice… no. I’m talkin’ green… kale-y…. murky juice. I admittedly said to myself something along the lines of, “hmm… I still feel like sh*t, maybe a Pressed Green Juice #3 will make this cold scoot along”… Dammit. I officially had a genuine thought that green juice would cure me. And double dammit I’ve gone so far as to find myself actually craving this vegetable concoction and needing excuses like an illness to drink them. So I’m a little ruined, and I completely blame Los Angeles.
There’s three things we Los Angelenos can’t seem to deal with out: frozen yogurt, cupcakes, and juice. While I had partaken, heavily, in frozen yogurt and cupcakes pretty much all throughout my life, the juice thing wasn’t sprung on me until I moved to the Westside. A year ago I watched a friend painfully endure a “three day cleanse” from Kreation; I watched her wince at just about every sip, of every juice, in every color of the rainbow. At first I thought, “well fuck if it’s that awful ,why? Why do it?”… then later that month I found myself ordering one despite having these confused emotions. But alas I decided I was up for the challenge of not being able to eat solid food and not being allowed to drink wine all in the name of gettin’ cleansed of said toxins, of which I had plenty. To tell you the truth I thought, “well, this will actually be a true test to find out if I have a serious food and wine problem”. I was a little nervous and unsure I have to say, but I stuck it out and managed to pass my own test, but bad news was I liked what I’d been drinking during this cleanse; I liked these veggie juices. Well most. Some were a touch painful. There’s some juices out there that I drank where I felt like the pounds must have been shedding instantaneously, like my body was saying, “props girl I can’t believe you really drank that.”
You either love juice, or you think it’s pretty much the stupidest thing ya ever done heard of. I know, just because it’s a bunch of squeezed fruits and veggies doesnt mean youre getting the exact same benefit of lets say eating a plate of those fruits and veggies… but the thought is just so nice? “I can drink vegetables? Great!”. I’m still a little afraid to tell people I like juicing because I realize it’s strange phenomenon that has ever evolved from the days of the Jack LaLanne juicer. We juice people know it’s a little crazy, but what are we supposed to do we’re surrounded by juice in LA so WE CANT HELP IT, we just want to be healthy! Well, that and have fun trying of course.
Even though my “cleansing” days are over, I still pick up a juice here and there from Kreation Cafe and Pressed. Don’t get me wrong those three days of having the flattest stomach I’ve ever had are incredible, but the starving child bloat by the 4th day I’ve decided maybe isn’t worth the $170 anymore. I could go on forever about my favorite kinds and which ones to mix, but I’ll spare us all the details, I mean it is just juice. But, juiceries and juice trucks are here to stay and so am I, so cheers to being bit by the juice bug and feeling so damn healthy. Thanks Los Angeles!