Guest Post: WWMD | GET NOTICED!

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WWMD (What Would Michelle Do) Love & Loathing LA

This week Michelle writes…

I have had a few people recently ask me, “how do you do it?”, “how do you get so much attention?”…ok, that came off arrogant, but what I meant by that is, a lot of my friends feel as though they constantly go un-noticed. Most of them claim they put themselves out there, but end up with nothing to show for it. My first question to them is always “how did you put yourself out there?”…

That is a very important aspect of getting noticed. Putting yourself out there doesn’t necessarily mean to put on a song and dance routine to get attention. Putting too much out there can back fire; you don’t want to come off as desperate. I often hear the advice given, “look at him/her, stare so they know you are interested”. I mean sure they will know you are interested, but by doing so you didn’t give them a chance to notice you. You just made the thrill of the chase less thrilling. So needless to say, I am not a fan of the stare down.

Allow me offer up a better alternative…let them voluntarily look your way (and by voluntarily I mean, you manipulating a situation where they will undoubtedly observe you with their own “freewill”). One way you could do this is, call a friend that is on their way to the meeting place, and tell them exactly where you are sitting. That way as soon as they walk in the door they will spot the table and wave at you, waving attention your way that is. Before they arrive, head outside (this way you can walk past your crush at least once before your friends arrive), when heading outside, do so at a fast pace, get on a “very important phone call” that needs your immediate attention. Walking at a fast pace in hurry outside is abnormal behavior, therefore will aid in grabbing your crush’s attention. While coming back inside walk calmly and slowly, giving you crush enough time to check you out. At this point you have planted your seed twice. Once your friends arrive, “heyyy! [Waves to the table]…attention from your crush take three! The next attention grabber could simply be you smiling and having a good time, at this point you may glance over and shoot your crush a smile. Boom! There is the “welcome” mat you have now just laid out. Instead of staring at your crush like a weirdo all night to get his/her attention, you have created attention and some wonder about yourself and then finalized with the look and smile to welcoming him/her in.

Another very important aspect of getting noticed is body language. Your body language needs to be talking “approachable”. If you don’t know how to speak approachable, then you’d better learn! Ready, here we go…1. Keep your head up; no one can look at you, if you can’t look at them (think about it). 2. Mama always told you to sit up straight, and mama knows best! 3. Don’t cross your arms over your chest, unless you are pissed off and don’t want to be approached by anyone! 4. Avoid playing with your hair, clothing, napkin, straw etc… nervous and fidgety = not a good look. 5. When you are talking to your crush, don’t sit your hands folded in your lap, do lean in to hear – be close, “accidentally” touch even, but be respectful of space at the same time. 6. Look straight into his/her eyes, show you are captivated, while captivating 7. PUT YOUR PHONE AWAY.

Tip: Flirt with friends. Use your friend of the opposite sex to your advantage. If you want a guy to notice you, have one of the guy friends you are with shower you with attention, hugs, laughs etc. People always want what they can’t have. If the person you have your eyes on is watching you receiving all that attention, chances are he/she will want in on that action. Later, when you meet, you can explain that the others are just your close friends whom you are not at all interested in.

Another way to get noticed is to be alone. Everyone would rather have one big shiny diamond, as opposed to a ton in a pile that all look the same. When in a group it may be harder to stand out, or be singled out. When are you are alone, you are free to receive ALL the attention. Sitting at a coffee shop, bar, restaurant alone…with the inviting body language I mentioned earlier, will easily welcome potential mates…especially if you accompany that welcoming language with a gracious smile.

Confidence is key to being noticed. If you are a nervous wreck or clearly starving for attention, you will surely be disappointed. Nothing is worse than the smell of desperation. If you are upbeat, confident and surrounding your self with positive welcoming vibes, it would be hard to go unnoticed.

 

Go get em’ tiger!

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