Guest Post: WWMD | Warning! Stage 5 Clinger Alert!

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WWMD (What Would Michelle Do) Love & Loathing LA

If there is anything in the (dating) world you do NOT want to be, that thing would be a “Stage 5 Clinger”. In fact you don’t even want to be a Stage 1 Clinger. To blatantly put it, just back off b*@%h!

To semi formally put it, the clinging effect is more or less a defense mechanism that gives people the illusion of being in “love” or being attached to a man/woman they might know very little about. Usually women are characterized as Stage 5 Clingers, but that isn’t to say that men can’t make the same, awfully annoying, moves.

An important thing to remember is if you are clingy, chances are there are voids in your life needing to be filled. You are attaching yourself, leech like, forcing someone into feelings, actions or emotions they may not be ready for. If you really like a guy/girl the worst thing you can do is overdo things to the point of ruin. Especially if things started off on a positive foot, you never know if you would have released your snake like constricting grip it just may have worked.

The clinging Don’ts!

– After the first date – Text the morning saying “I miss you”. NOT POSSIBLE (unless you have an acute case of amnesia)

– Multiple texts – If you are in the stage of the relationship where you text daily, it is important to be patient! If you text your man/woman at 10:00am and they don’t reply by 10:05am, do not proceed to continue text them every 10 minutes. Chances are they are busy and the multiple texts are nothing more than annoying. When you send a text the person on the receiving end will reply when they are able.

– Adding to the above mentioned multiple texts, do not start accusing the receiving of anything negative due to not replying to your texts. Chill out damn!

– After the first few dates or beginning stages of a relationship, do not go on social media outlets and proceed to start adding or following your man/woman friends and family. Or cling on clinger!

– Do not get pouty if your man/woman greets friends of the opposite sex. Its one thing to show you care, but it’s another to be a jealous cling on.

– Unless you have been a long term relationship with said person for a while, do not give a man/woman gifts with both your names on it. Pendants with your initials, frames with your photos, engraved gifts….NO!

– If someone is being vague… they mean to be vague.

Example: Them: See you soon You: (should not reply with) How soon? Or Soon, like tomorrow? Or hopefully sooner than later because I miss you

– If someone is giving a reason (excuse) to not see you, accept it. Replying with solving the problem will only be annoying and make you look sad.

Example: Them: Sorry my car is in the shop You: I’ll just come pick you up and take you home

Them: Aw man, I just made dinner plans with my roommate sorry! You: It’s ok! I have a friend in the area I’ll just pick her up and we can all go?

 

There are many more examples of a Stage 5 Clinger but you get the picture. The most important thing to remember is that people live most of their young adult lives alone, which means this is what they are accustomed to. Sharing your life, alone time, personal space and sanity with someone is a challenge, clinging on to the point of annoyance makes the challenge unbearable.

 

Happy dating!

Michelle

 

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